Welcoming the desire to smoke is exactly the opposite of resisting it - so why is it important to fully understand this desire when learning how to quit smoking? If you welcome it you embrace and entertain it, becoming completely open to this feeling of anxiety. You make it your friend instead of your adversary.
Each desire to smoke will inevitably disappear in time: you do not get stuck in a permanent state of desiring to smoke. But the vital move in stopping smoking is to accept it while it's there. There are a number of reasons for this, and it's essential to understand them to be able to live with something that's very uncomfortable.
Your typical response will be to resist feeling uncomfortable: this is human nature. If you are too hot, you open a window. When there's a pebble in your shoe, you take it out. Always you are trying to maintain a state of comfort. This is an acceptable, self-correcting mechanism that helps you keep a state of contented well-being, as much as you can.
With an addiction, however, this natural instinct for looking for comfort gets in the way. It's because, when quitting smoking and breaking free from an addiction, the sense of anxiety is completely the very best thing to be experiencing, above all else.
Feeling the distress of an unsatisfied desire to smoke is your healing process, your recovery from addiction.
Subsequently, you will have to deliberately intervene, to override your usual instincts, and remind yourself that, in this instance, discomfort is good for you.
It is good for you because while you are feeling it, you are not smoking. As a direct result of feeling the discomfort of your desire, you're taking control, and the standard of your own life will improve in different ways. It may even, quite literally, save your life.
It is unlikely that you'll welcome discomfort automatically. You must consciously think this through to get yourself to understand the value in it.
If you welcome your very own desire to smoke:
You are far less likely to smoke unconsciously, without realizing what you're doing, simply because you are able to consciously acknowledge its presence.
You resolve the conflict you feel since you are saying, in no uncertain terms, that you would rather feel this uneasiness than spend all your life smoking. Less conflict, much less tension and worry.
You overcome your fear of it, because once you welcome the desire nothing could make you smoke. By doing this you could quickly become confident about not smoking, in all kinds of conditions and even under stress.
You can see through the delusions that smoking would help you in some way - even, perhaps, that smoking is essential in some particular situation. You break your very own sense of dependency because you could see it more objectively as just another desire to smoke. Smoking simply satisfies it - nothing more.
You release any pressure (physical aches and nervous energy) you might otherwise develop in your battle against feeling the desire. It's like walking right into a gale, and then changing direction so that the wind is behind you. When you welcome the distress, you are going along in the same direction. You'll be able to see that you have got a desire to smoke and you could be there with it and even relax with it.
You actually let the desire burn off like a kettle burning off steam. Avoiding and paying no attention to the desire doesn't do this, which is the reason why it's essential to experience the feelings of desire when you have stopped smoking. It isn't only the passing of time that causes the desire to disappear.
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