When we are referring to subjects such as "relating to women", or "how to relate to women" or "Can you relate to women?", I often get asked about how to start getting physical with a girl that you have known as a pal for some time.
Getting physical is one thing that generally occurs naturally between a guy and a girl over a three month period unless either of them is extremely uncomfortable on disinterested.
When a man is not comfortable with approaching a girl for a physical relationship, the the most important thing that a guy could do to handle that is learn to observe and make use of gradients.
What exactly are gradients? Gradients are just like steps on a ladder which you climb to reach the top. Some guys might try to head to the top of the ladder without climbing any of the steps. And that makes the girl uneasy as well as the guy.
A man who is not comfortable in this field should learn both how to identify gradients when women make use of them and how to use gradients on girls.
Not every woman will begin at the same gradient. A few girls will start with a kiss after a first date, and proceed steadily or rapidly from there - from kissing, to making out, to petting, to heavy petting and lastly to sexual relations. If a man attempts to jump to the "sexual relations" step without going through the other gradients, he may just lose the girl. On the other hand, you can lose a girl as you are moving up the gradients too slowly.
Now other girls won't even be up to the gradient of giving you a goodnight kiss until the seventh date. Gradients for her might be: getting to know you, speaking about sexual topics indirectly (for instance commiserating regarding an ex-boyfriend), accidental touch (clashing with you as you go walking), purposeful little touches to your arm or leg, holding onto your arm while you walk, holding your hand, after which a goodnight kiss.
If you are not comfortable with this area and want to get physical with a girl, flirt with her, romance her, notice where she is on the gradients of sexual contact, then take her up the gradients lightly. As long as you don't by pass a lot of gradients, if she is interested, she will move up the gradients quickly or slowly depending on her persona.
If she is not interested, she probably won't budge. Try lowering the gradient and if she still doesn't move up, try speaking about it. Ask her if she is serious about a relationship with you or if she only wants to be friends.
Don't forget that most girls won't go out on a "date" with you unless they are already vaguely okay with the idea of getting physical with you. Therefore you might like to make clear if you are dating or simply "hanging out."
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